Posted by : Patrick | November 25, 2015
After a recent conversation in which a friend tried to convince me that gratitude is a quantifiable concept that can be measured and analyzed (she did not succeed), I’m in the mood to write some things about movies I in someway feel thanks for. Also, I’m under orders from Stephanie to produce holiday posts. It’s in my contract or something. Anyway, although there’s no way to prove beyond all doubt that my appreciation truly exists (admit it, Lisa!), like with past gratefulness, believe me, these are sincere.
5.) I Didn’t Have to Watch Jem and the Holograms
This was on the list of movies my sadistic partner was making me see this year, but luckily, after she saw the horrible trailer that made the movie look like it really had nothing to do with the world-saving superhero aspect of what looks like a bizarre 80s cartoon, she withdrew the nomination, meaning I no longer had to sit through two hours of awful teen melodrama about splitting up the band and being a good friend. Sigh of relief.
4.) Interesting Westerns are Still Being Made
Man, this favorite genre of mine once ruled the multiplexes, but it’s something that no one seems interested in anymore. Which is what I hope will happen to superhero movies one day, but that’s beside the point. what’s important here is that S. Craig Zahler’s Bone Tomahawk, starring the immeasurable Kurt Russell, proved that there’s life in westerns yet, telling a story with familiar archetypes yet a unique vibe that even included a horror element. The Hateful Eight will get more attention, but there’s no question in my mind that this will end up as the meatier experience for fans of oaters. Listen to our podcast to find out why.
3.) Love and Mercy Wasn’t Popular, Making It Even Cooler
Don’t you just love it when you and only a few other people know how awesome something is? It’s like being part of a snooty, exclusive club, which gives me a superiority complex when it comes to my cinematic taste. Besides, it’s not like stuff that deserves to be seen should actually sell tickets; that’s what sell-outs like Ant-Man are for. Not that I would know- I’m not into the mainstream. So don’t go see what will surely go down as one of the best movies of the year, with three performances likely to get recognition from the Academy Awards. Seriously, if every one of you Joe-Popcorn’s watches it, I’ll have nothing to brag about and most likely will lose my identity. And while I’m at it, let’s throw Everest in there as well.
2.) No More Hunger Games
Yay! Oh my God, that’s it, I made it. I survived the Hunger Games…franchise. Frankly, after watching Catching Fire, I had doubts as to whether I would ever feel happy again. But after years of healing I went back to face my fears and saw Mockingjay – Part 2, the last film about the last book in Suzanne Collins’ teen apocalyptic romance series. To my surprise, it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a good movie at all, but at least this one didn’t leave scars. Or maybe I’ve just been hardened by life in this post-Hunger Games world. Either way, I emerged from the theater a victor, and I look forward to a long life never having to see another one of these movies ever again. Ever. Again.
1.) Mad Max Delivered As Promised
I was touting this one for so long, it seemed impossible for Fury Road to live up to expectations, but that’s exactly what it did, and more. I’ve seen the movie five times already (four in theaters), and I still say it’s the cinematic experience of the year (we’ll see if that holds up when The Revenant releases). Mad Max: Fury Road being good is what I’m most thankful for this year, because it had been a looong time since I felt like a kid again absolutely enthralled by a summer action movie. It’s pure movie magic.
And that’s it- no more Thanksgiving posts for a whole year! If gratitude could truly be measured by science, my readings would be off the chart right now. It feels like I’ve busted out of jail, or even a post-apocalyptic chastity belt. This euphoria will surely be crushed by the time Oscar nominations are announced and The Martian inexplicably nabs a Best Picture nod, but whatever. I’ll enjoy the bliss while it lasts.